Today I've heard this French expression for the first time - le manque affectif. My French is on a dodgy beginner level so I looked it up in Google dictionary. It apparently means an emotional gap. This came up in the conversation that I had with someone in relation to what I talked (rather arrogantly, on reflection...) about in this post - diet and weight.
The other day a friend of mine kindly invited us to supper. Some friends of theirs, whom I'd met several times before, were there, too. After a session of 'nice to see you again' kisses with everyone, I noticed that one of them clearly gained weight since I last saw him. Then I watched him making a bee-line for drink nibbles - crisps, cheese, and olives - and continuously eating them. It almost looked as if he was trying to make up for something that he didn't have or lost. I had a feeling that this 'something' wasn't food. It was something else. Later I discovered what this something was, and it was to do with his emotions.
I've been thinking about what our hidden emotions can do to us. It's so very easy for us to judge other people from how they look and how they behave, but we would probably realise that our judgement is wrong once we know a bit more about their emotional goings-on. Our emotional void hugely affects what we do or don't do. You could make a pig of yourself or starve yourself. This void could be a recent one or from childhood, and it's all about attention-seeking, I think.
The tricky thing is that we are completely or only partially aware of the void. I guess what you need is a good and honest company who care about you, a bit of reflection, and some conscious rewiring in your brain. I'm hoping that the man I saw at my friends' place would find someone and would become aware of the void in his heart.
This is nutritious, warm, and tasty, and it will fill up your heart. Got the idea from fabulous Nigel Slater's recipe. I read his cookbooks like novels.
Ingredients (for 1 person as a light lunch or for 2 people as a side dish):
200g frozen, or 400g fresh broad beans in husks
100g pancetta, cut in small chunks
half of a fennel bulb, very thinly sliced
Boil the broad beans without salt for about 5 minutes and pod them. Fry the pancetta in olive oil until brown and add the fennel. When the fennel is wilted add the beans. Stir around for a few more minutes. Season with salt and pepper to taste.